Being married for over 15 years – I don’t beat-around the bush, so to speak… 😉 But it’s one thing I’ve learned – Valentines is always hot and steamy, so I thought I would give you a hot and steamy Valentines day idea that is sure to be a hit. Everyone should buckle up for this one.
As always I love to bring you what I think are the best ideas on the web. Most of you that really know me already know I have to take a shot at writing the best Valentines day post ever. 🙂 So here is my highly NC-17 Valentines Day idea. In very good humor, but in very poor taste.
If you are looking to steam things up for this Valentines Day, I got just the thing for you. So I call this idea the “Say hello to my big fucking friend.” How this goes is, you are going to need a bottle of Jagermeister, the bigger the better. You give your girlfriend or wife about 3 shots right off the bat. After doing some shots and maybe little dinner take her into the bedroom. There you will have some candles lit, some rose pedals on the bed and some nice music playing in the background. It is important to set the mood. Also don’t forget to slip the friend under the pillow before hand, all ready to go. Don’t be trying to bust this open on the spot. You’ve got to be sly about it. With 3 nice size shots in her, you should be good to go. So when it gets nice and steamy slip your “friend” in play. But just in case something backfires, bring the bottle of Jager to bed with you, and have her take some swigs from the bottle, Girls Gone Wild style, while you are talking her panties off. Make sure to take it easy Killer, too much Jager and you’ll be humping your fist. You want her tipsy, not DOA, whoa!
Please Note: make sure that when picking out a “Friend” make sure you use some discretion. If your spouse or girl friend goes to church every week and you bring home a four foot Long-Duck-Dong you are likely to be thrown out of the house. So for this application, might I suggest something small, with some triple a batteries. It is important to have your wife or girl friends sexual appetite in mind.